4) Sending an Introduction Message |
We all know first-impressions can make or break your chances at dating someone you like, but that concept is much more significant when it comes to meeting people online.
When someone is meeting people online, it's as easy as one click or scroll for them to ignore your message. If you send a message to someone you think you might like but say the wrong things and ask the wrong questions, you will most likely never hear back from that person.
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Because it's so easy for people to dismiss the messages they receive on online dating sites, it is incredibly important to learn how to write introduction messages that catch people's attention and inspire them to write back. Read through the following tips and you will be on your way to writing introduction messages that get results!
Prepare your Profile
It doesn't make sense to send someone an introduction message if your online profile is not up to date and ready to go. The last thing you want to do is send someone to your profile if it doesn't represent you the way you want it to.
Go through your tagline, essay portions of your profile, and your photographs to make sure everything looks good. Your introduction message and your profile combine to become your first impression to other people online, so you should always make sure they are updated and polished as much as possible.
Write a Subject
The subject of your introduction message will most likely be the first thing a person you like sees of you, so you want to make it great. Writing a good subject line is all about being light and fun while showing the person you are interested in them. If you and the recipient have something in common, mention it in the subject line. This will help to spark their interest immediately and will increase the chances that they will read and reply to your message. Instead of using generic phrases and broad comments in your subject line, mention something specific so they know you really looked at their profile and that you already have something in common.
Write a Greeting
Be sure to greet your recipient by name. It might seem obvious, but many people are turned off by a letter if it begins without a greeting. Many people don't like to reply to messages unless there is something specific to them in the message, such as their name. If you greet them in the beginning and use their name, they will know you are not just sending messaging to everyone you find. It will show them that you are really interested in them, have read through their online dating profile, and are ready to start some ongoing communication.
Tell Them Why You Are Interested
After you have said hello with a short greeting, explain the reasons why you decided to send the person a message in the first place. If you are taking the time to write out a letter to someone, you obviously have a reason to be interested. Just be honest and explain to them the aspects of their profile that caught your attention. This is a great way to break the ice initially, plus it will give the person an idea of what you like about them. This will not only make them like you for that, but it will most likely inspire the person to send you a message in reply.
A QUICK NOTE: Avoid giving compliments on their physical appearance. You might be incredibly attracted to someone, but telling them too soon could end things before they even start. Talking about their physical appearance will make you seem less serious about a relationship, so hold on to those compliments until you are more comfortable with each other.
Discuss Common Interests
Write about the interests that you and the recipient have in common. This is another great way to break the ice and get a conversation going with someone you don't know well. Having a common interest to talk about will not only help you to keep the conversation going, but it will give you and the other person a chance to connect with each other, relate to one another, and get an idea of each other's personalities.
Don't be too broad, though. Be specific. Don't just tell the recipient that you like to play sports; instead, tell them about how you bowled your first game over 200 last week. Don't just tell them about how much you like to read; talk about the last book you read, your favorite authors, or your favorite books of all time. Don't just tell them you enjoy riding your bike; tell them you have a Specialized road bike and have been riding along the canal with your brother since you were kids.
Meeting people online is all about searching for people with common interests and finding out if there is enough chemistry to move forward with a date. Discussing common interests will quicken up this process, allowing you and other online daters to discuss common topics and feel out each other's personalities.
Ask Open-ended Questions
A key element of an introduction letter is asking questions about the recipient. You don't want to send an introduction message in which you simply tell them about yourself and that you are interested. You also want to avoid asking them questions that will give you a list of yes or no answers in reply.
Try to think of some good, open-ended questions for the recipient that will allow them to explain their answers in their own words. This will not only help to keep the conversation going, but it will allow the recipient to talk about him/herself in a comfortable way; they won't feel like they are talking about themselves too much. As the recipient answers you questions, their personality will come through in the answers and you will learn more about them.
Ask questions about topics they mention in their profile so you know they will have something to say. This can also help if you ask the recipient questions about a topic you both have listed in your profile; this way, you know you will have a response to their answers and the conversation with keep flowing smoothly.
Invite Them to Contact You
Near the end of your message, make sure invite the recipient to contact you back. Doing this will help to increase your chances of getting a reply. Telling the recipient to contact you back one way or another shows you are really interested in them, shows you are easy going, and inspires them to message you back.
Say Goodbye and Sign Your Name
At the end of your introduction message, make sure you sign your name. Signing your name at the end of a message gives it a necessary personal touch. This is another subtle detail you don't want to overlook. Signing with your name at the end of an introduction message will make you seem more kind and approachable, but most importantly it will make sure the recipient knows your name!
Good luck! |
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